The Secret to Success and Victorious Living

Okay, here we go! Are you waiting for some sophisticated deep analytical montage, made up of a medley of psychological mumbo jumbo? Well, you ain't gonna get it here! My blogs deal with truth and reality, not pious platitudes that sound good and make you feel good but produce no good!

Everybody is after something. What is it for you? Do you dream of some sort of success? Is it success in business? Is it success in marriage? Is it success in family? Is it success in health, wealth and happiness? Or is it success in being a good person and making a difference in this world? How about success in living life? Ever try that?   I didn’t think so!

All of these definitions are right but I think it is even more important to live a balanced life of success. Successful living is victorious living. It involves more than just having a certain amount in your bank account or reaching a certain career height. Victorious living in the broadest sense is:

• A life that is full of opportunities whether good or bad and you are able to conquer them and make them work for you.
• A life full of fun and meaningful work, if your fun is grounded in morality and your work actually works for you.
• A life where you can spend plenty of time with the people you care about, but also you know how to navigate around the toxic people in your life. Those that are energy drainers!
• A life that you live without regrets because you have learned how to turn regrets into rejoicing.

Life is simple: Learn to turn your wheel before you hit the pole. Too many people have mastered the art of hitting the poles in front of them and then they get the brilliant idea of turning the wheel after smashing their car.   But hello! The damage is already done. Wake up people!

1.   Slow Motion

The reason why we sometimes overlook success and fail at being victorious in life is because we are always in a hurry and we don’t think, we react. When my kids were small, I always taught them the principle of “Slow Motion” techniques. Ex. “Honey when you go into the refrigerator to get daddy and egg, do it in slow motion. That is, take an extra breath and thought to slow your pace down because you are coming into something that is delicate and easily breakable.” Slow your approach down to life. Think, concentrate and be proactive and preemptive.

Allow yourself to slow down, relax, breathe and ponder on what victorious living truly looks like. Let yourself break free from the expectations of others and the norms that our society dictates to us. Allow your life to be governed by God’s rules not societies, your families or even your own. God created you and He is the one who has put together the manual that will guide you through life. If you follow that manual, you will discover that, “Success is getting what you want but happiness is wanting what you get.” When you are doing things God’s way, you will get His results.

2.  Life is relentless and it will sink you, if you let it!

After you have slowed down you will hear a voice inside of you saying “Now declutter your lifestyle.” Living a victorious life does not mean being a superman or a superwoman. You do not have to run a marathon in order to be in good shape – just 30 minutes of running or brisk walking daily is enough.

You do not have to drive a very expensive car in order to show your status.

You do not have to be someone you do not want to be.

However, you do need to know when to heave things off your boat when it is sinking. Eliminate goals that are not meaningful to you, declutter your house, stop communicating with people who drain you emotionally, and give up “empty” activities (TV and too much internet surfing are definitely the first ones to go).

You need to know what things to stare at at what things to glance at. Ex. I have people in my counseling ministry who come to me staring at the fact that they have no job, their health is failing, their kids are off the wall, and their marriage is on the rocks as they stare at their sad state of affairs. Bu then I say to them, “Stop staring at the symptoms of your mess, and start staring at your root problems which are drugs or alcohol abuse!   Wake up man! Begin staring at overcoming the root issues that initially led you into drugs and alcohol abuse and begin glancing at the symptoms that are merely manifestations of your root issues. Cut the source of your pain and the symptoms will vanish!

By getting rid of things that you do not need, you make room for success & victorious living.

3.  Learn the secret of closure living

“I do not think there is any other quality so essential to success of any kind as the quality of perseverance. It overcomes almost everything, even nature.” Giving up on something in life is always the easiest route, but it is not the route that will take you to success and victorious living. Listen closely to this simple principle: Everything in life has a Beginning, Middle and Ending. For instance, I began to think about writing this piece. That’s the Beginning.   Then I began to write it. That’s the Middle.

Now if I keep writing and writing and writing and never end this piece, then you would get frustrated and upset reading it and I would be put in a mental hospital for CWFS (Continuous Writing Fatigue Syndrome). I just made that up, but I think you get the idea. You see, using my above example, I have here two components for success but because I fail to bring an ending to it, I am doomed to failure because there is no plan for closure! Almost all the people I counsel come to me with a Beginning and a Middle but do not know how to bring an Ending to their problems. No closure!

When you leave things hanging, it is then you experience, anxiety, stress, anger, fear, depression, hopelessness and for some it leads to drugs to anesthetize their pain or suicide to end it. Example: A married woman came to me and shared the fact that she was having panic attacks that led to constant stress and depression. I found out she had had two abortions and the shame and guilt over them had been a source of extreme pain and depression.

Okay, I said, “We have a Beginning. You came to me for help. We also have a Middle. We are talking about it and getting it out.” She then said, “Well yes, I have always had that Beginning and Middle but I never knew what to do to bring an Ending to it. So it just festers around me like a deep fog that clouds my vision and distorts my view of life and myself.”

I said, here is how we put an Ending to it!   I gave her some practical steps to deal with her issues and as time went by and execution of those steps were implemented, the heavy emotional and psychological pain that hung over her, dissipated and closure brought health and healing to her. The secret is developing a Beginning, Middle and Ending mindset! That is the key to successful and victorious living. So, simple yet, so complicated!  

 I deal with these kinds of issues every day. If you have a Beginning and a Middle in your life but do not know how to bring and Ending to it (Closure), then contact me and we will help you to make the right choices and to experience health and healing in your life.